Everything We Say Out Loud is Programming

Did you know that most heart attacks occur on Mondays? And that lifestyle choices such as what you eat and your exercise patterns are not the first indicators of your potential for a heart attack? Did you know that it is whether you think you are happy or not, and whether you are satisfied with your job or not?? Anyway, that's what Depak Chopra said on a wonderful CD called the New Physics of Healing.

Speaking of the physics of healing, I had an epiphany about self-talk while I was vacuuming this morning. I always teach my clients that everything we say out loud and to ourselves is programming. But I don't think it's the words so much as the feelings that we are having when we are saying those words. For example, I've noticed that my New Yorker friends chastise themselves a lot. They're always saying stuff like "I'm such an idiot," and sometimes it's more like "I'm such a f*ing idiot." But one friend, in particular, laughs when she says it, so I don't think it harms her self-image. In fact, she has a very healthy self-image! When we laugh, we release lovely chemicals. When we laugh, we relax. When we laugh, we stimulate our immune system. And I also think, that when we laugh, and when we feel good, we are also creating delightful neural pathways that impact our beliefs about ourselves and the world.

So as always, it seems to go back to feelings. It's nothing more than feelings. Hmm, sounds like there might be a song in there somewhere.

p.s. I think I should vacuum more often.

A great marketing idea!

Dear Stephanie:

Please post the following to your groups. Their posts have helped me so much over the years, I hope mine will help some of them:

Hi everybody, I used to be on these lists and I miss them, but I got too busy in my practice to read so much e-mail!

I wanted to share with you that one of my favorite marketing tools is placing Steph’s book, “Everyday Miracles of Hypnotherapy” in doctor’s offices. I put a sticker on the book that says “Do Not Remove – Office Copy”. I put a tab at the top pointing to my own story because having someone see your name in print gives you great credibility. I also paper clip a bunch of my cards inside the front cover. But you don't have to have a story in the book! Just clip your cards in there!

I have gotten a few calls so now I’m broadening my marketing base. Even if folks don’t call me, they are still learning about how wonderful hypnosis really is, and maybe someday they WILL call me or recommend hypnosis to their sister who lives where you are. Right now, I have Steph’s book in six doctor’s offices, and I just ordered twenty more for doctors, acupuncturists, dentists and anyone else I can think of. I think I’ll bring one to my hairdresser. I just ask the doctor if it’s okay if I leave the book in their waiting room. No one has yet said no. One chiropractor said that he was grateful to have it because he felt that his was a healing office, and he really didn’t want people reading “People.”

They are also good for a door-prize when you give a talk! It’s much more reasonable to give a book that costs you $12 or less than to give away a session! And then I tell them to give the book away once they have read it. The more people that read it, the better!

Miss you guys! Hope to see some of you at the NGH.

Love, Lynda


Lynda Malerstein, C. Ht.
Power Journeys Hypnosis
2211 Corinth Ave., #309
Los Angeles, CA 90064
<http://www.powerjourneys.com>www.powerjourneys.com
(310) 228-3160
Feel the Freedom of Letting Go!

Fear of Flying or being kicked?

Hi all - How about this little tidbit to shift someone's paradigm. I've heard that you are more likely to be kicked to death by a donkey than to die in a airplane crash. Hmm. Food for thought. I hopeit's true! Love, Steph

An affirmation for you today

Dear groups, thanks to a some wonderful friends (you know who you are), I am back. What I mean by that is that for a short while I forgot who I was, and now I'm fully present to who I am and wha's up!

I came up with an affirmation in the middle of the night and wanted to share it. Please try it on, and tell me how it works out for you. I alsothink it's going to be the title of my next book.

It is:

Everything I need or want, I have. Right here. Right now.

Isn't that powerful? I thought so, too! ; - )

Love, Steph

Why we do what we do.

Here's a wonderful (unsolicited) testimonial from one of my clients. I wanted to share.

Today was my first big (motorcycle) ride since the hypnosis....and I have to tell you, it was the most wonderful, relaxed, ENJOYABLE ride I've had! We rode over 100 miles - Niles Canyon, hopped on 680 for about 1/8 mile then got on the Livermore Vallecitos (84), then we hit Vasco Road which used to scare me spitless. We were with my mom's fiance and he was heading home and George said "I want to go with you" and the next thing I knew, I was coming too!

I think what happened, and I felt it, I went into trance during the ride itself. It was not unlike my 'geek mode' trance, only this one was all about riding. It was awesome. I was so relaxed, I kind of leaned back and just enjoyed the ride. I was going freeway speeds and not freaking out(!) We got on Vasco road and were doing 60-65 most of the way and I was just fine. My mom's fiance pointed us to a country road we had ridden before that looped back to Concord so we hopped on that, then went over Kirker Pass road (great road) and I hit 70 on that road and didn't even know it. I was just hummin' along, Thor purring nicely underneath me. We rode along this road that used to be the way you got to Concord and that area before 680 went in (I'm dating myself now) and that was great. Then we went into Pleasanton and had brunch but that was difficult; everything at the buffet was what I now refer to as "bloat food" and I ordered a single item off the menu instead, one that involved lean chicken breast. Then we got back on the road again, and that was the road that is the road I envision in trance - where each mile I am leaner. Speaking of that, this was the first time I donned my chaps since I got ride of some poundage and they were flopping around, so I need to get them altered, as they are a little bit dangerously large.

We flew through Niles Canyon, comfortably. We picked up a couple on a Harley so they were riding in staggered formation behind me. Just where I like to be, in the middle of a formation. And here we are! We did about 115 miles; I have to go check my trip-meter. It was at 93 when I filled in Pleasanton. But I found that I really didn't need to fill up. I averaged over 60mpg!!!! (Take that OPEC!)

Well I just wanted you to know what a difference the hypnosis has made on my riding as well as my lifestyle. (sigh) I can't say enough!

-M

(Note from Steph)- I also taught her how to put herself into trance for work, and she told me that she sat down to a project that she thought would take four hours, and it took her forty-five minutes. Yay! Of course I did not tell her I thought that motorcycle riding is CRAZY! :) You've gotta give the client what they want!!

Doctor's Orders

Talk about a PET PEEVE of mine! My mother was in the hospital, on a ventilator, 82 pounds soaking wet, very ill from Emphysema (which is why I went into the business, by the way!) and her stupid, unconscious doctor told me that she would die in the hospital and that I should start making arrangements. One of my mother's final wishes was that she die in her own bed at home. She did not like hospitals. It's not only vital to phrase things the way Melissa suggested - to the patient. But it's also imperative that any dialogs they have with the family be equally encouraging. Or at the very least, not discouraging.

Well, fortunately, that idiot doctor was WRONG!!! My mother not only got off the ventilator, but was able to come home and die in her own bed.

As far as I'm concerned, telling patients and their family members something no doctor can possibly know (that they are going to die!), is UNETHICAL. I didn't realize that Melissa taught doctors and nurses how to deliver the news better when she gave her workshops in hospitals. But wow, Dis, Bravo! Just something else to add to my list of reasons why I love and admire you! That is totally wonderful. So necessary. So needed.

I choose to believe that times are changin', too!

How Woo Woo Are You?

I got this from a friend of mine (who's a life coach), and I just HAD to pass it on. It's too great. It's a quiz on how to determine how woo-woo you really are ; - ) I won't tell you how high I scored! But I really want to find a doggie yoga studio for Pooky! ; - )

How Woo Woo Are You?

Take this simple quiz to find out…

* You know how to clean your chakras.
* Prayer flags adorn your backyard.
* Your voicemail greeting says Namaste.
* You talk to your plants and they answer you.
* You use the words resonate or vibration in your daily speech.
* You own a deck of animal/spirit/angel/tarot cards (any or all).
* You know what a backjack is.
* You’ve consulted a pet psychic.
* You live in Marin, Boulder, Amherst, Sedona, or possibly Los Angeles.
* You own more than 10 different kinds of herbal tea.
* You have an altar in your office.
* Your cell phone ring is Ram Ram Sita Ram.
* You’ve done a Vision Quest.
* You know the word Ho means more than just a hooker on the street.
* You know who you’ve been in past lives, and who you’ll be in future ones.
* You won’t date someone based on what sign they are.
* You have embraced your inner child.
* All your vacation time is spent on retreat.
* You own property in an Intentional Community.
* You own several crystals and believe they wield special healing powers.
* Your dog goes to Doggie Yoga.
* You know tantra isn’t something a 2 year old throws.
* You have used a pendulum to determine the sex of your child when pregnant.
* You wear different aromatherapy scents on different days to alter your moods.
* You have legally re-named yourself with a one-word name. (for example, Tree)
* You have been to see a psychic, palm reader, clairvoyant, or channeler.
* You are a psychic, palm reader, clairvoyant, or channeler.
* You have become a kabbahlist and wear the required red yarn bracelet to keep evil spirits away. (Be warned, if you follow this trend to imitate Madonna (see#25), you might actually be in another category called wanna be woo-woo, also known as ‘L.A. pretend spirituality’. You probably also have a bumper sticker that says ‘Save Tibet’ even though you know nothing of the true politics behind it.)
* You own a pair of reflexology slippers.
* You saw “What the Bleep” more than twice.
* You are intimately involved with your shadow material (the one in your psyche, not the one on the sidewalk when it’s sunny).
* Your Pavlovian response to a bell is to bow.
* You have been re-birthed.
* You regularly sage your house/car/workspace.
* You have feng shui’d your house/car/workspace.
* You have both solstices and equinoxes marked in your Palm Pilot and
throw ritual celebrations marking their passing.
* You will or won’t move into a new home based on how the address adds up in numerology.
* You regularly consult your dead ancestors and live by their advice.
* You know what dowsing is.
* You spend more time talking to your spirit guides than your real friends.
* You know what color your aura is.
* You base life decisions on whether or not mercury is in retrograde.
* You’ve been through The Landmark Series, A Course in Miracles, Eckankar, or EST.
* You have your massage therapist, reiki practitioner, acupuncturist, and chiropractor in your cell phone.
* You know your number on the Enneagram, your soul type, and your Ayurvedic type.
* You have a spiritual guru and you travel across the earth to see them.
* When the officer asks you what happened? You respond, “I manifested an accident.”
* You have a “Clean 10 Get 1 Free” Frequent Colonic card at the Light as Feather Colonic Parlor.
* Life without mantras/prayers has no meaning at all.
* You are, or you employ, a Life Coach.

1-12 You Haven’t Drunk the Woo Juice Yet
13-25 On the Road to Wooville
26-39 Woo Hoo!
40-50 One With the Wooniverse

Keeping A Promise

Long ago, in a galaxy far, far, away - 1992 in San Diego- a fair maiden, whose heart was pure and idealistic, learned that her mother was soon to die. Her mother, a fun, outgoing, lovely woman of face and spirit, was very, very ill with the debilitating disease of emphysema. Shortly before her early death at the young age of 64, weighing a mere 92 pounds, the disease having ravaged her poor, frail body, this mother asked her daughter for a promise -- that her daughter would quit smoking. Her daughter not only made that promise to her mother and kept it (before she died), but she also promised her mother that she would find a way to help others to quit smoking.

Let’s go back even further now to another galaxy, even further away: Los Angeles, California, when our fair maiden was about nineteen years old (the year would probably be around 1852) and she took a self-hypnosis course from the famed stage hypnotist Pat Collins (The Hip Hypnotist). Now lest you judge stage hypnotists unfairly, please let me say that if the stage hypnotist is of a strong moral and ethical bent, the stage hypnotist will educate people on the fact that hypnosis can be used for many herapeutic interventions, and not just to make people cluck like chickens or bark like dogs. And most stage hypnotists will do just that. Pat Collins was one of them. Because of that self-hypnosis course, our fair maiden’s imagination for the possibilities of hypnosis was inexorably, irrevocably, and forever excited. And one of the things that excited our fair maiden the most was the possibility that one could help people quit smoking with hypnosis! How glorious, how magical, how grand and lofty a goal it seemed to her since she, herself, was a committed smoker, smoking two packs of Marlboro 100s per day.

Fast forward about thirteen years, back to our galaxy of San Diego, and our fair maiden remembered that long ago (and far away) class. And even though she had had all the best intentions of using the skills that she had learned in that class, she hadn’t in all those years, young people believing that they are invincible, as they will. But all was not lost! She decided to get honest with herself. After all, she was not getting any younger (by this time our fair maiden was thirty-two). She decided she must quit. She wiped the cobwebs from her mind, brushing up on those skills, and on April 27, 1992 at 10:30 am, our fair maiden, to honor her mother’s wish and to save her own life, quit smoking using those long ago learned skills of self-hypnosis. Did our fair maiden succeed? She most certainly did! And then after the sad, unnecessary death of her beautiful mother, she began her journey to help others to quit smoking.

Our fair maiden went to school to become a hypnotherapist and learned many things that surprised and delighted her and that she could not wait to tell her future clients and that she knew would make them feel very comfortable and happy about hypnosis and hypnotherapy, indeed. And if they listened very, very carefully, they would learn and remember -

• That hypnosis is a normal and natural state which we all go in and out of every day.
• That you would never be made to do anything you did not want to do, or anything outside of your moral code or value system.
• That posthypnotic amnesia does not occur spontaneously. So in most circumstances, you would remember everything that happened in trance.
• That you would always remain in complete control of yourselves, and in fact, would be the most in control of your minds than you have ever been.
• That you could not stay stuck in hypnosis, ever.
• That hypnosis is not asleep or unconscious
• That you would be hyper-aware while in the state of hypnosis, your other senses becoming much more acute (just as they are right now).
• That hypnosis is a very real phenomenon where the subconscious mind is much more open and suggestible as proven by CAT scan and numerous scientific validations.
• That you could learn to make changes easily, effortlessly, and permanently.
• That in most cases our fair maiden would only be seeing you for three to six sessions for most issues.
• That hypnosis feels wonderful.
• And last but not least, that any change your mind could conceive of (within the realm of physiological and psychological possibility), you could achieve, together.

And then, when our fair maiden graduated hypnotherapy school after two hundred hours of training, she did not stop there. Beginning her practice immediately, she has had over one thousand hours of training in Neurolinguistic Programming, Reiki, Emotional Freedom Techniques, Be Set Free Fast, and Tapas Acupressure Techniques. Since becoming a ertitifed hypnotherapist, our fair maiden has had her own radio show, been on local television in San Diego, created and taught her own healing techniques on both the west and east coasts, written a manual “3-in-1 Positive Solutions in Energy Therapy,” co-authored a book of scripts and inductions, edited a book of hypnotherapy case histories, written and produced dozens of hypnotherapy and energy therapy cds, is the moderator and director of a worldwide hypnotherapist list on the internet with over 450 members, and continues, to this day, to increase her knowledge and proficiency every single day.

Our fair maiden (now an old, married woman) is very, very lucky indeed because she has found her true calling. She has learned that she can help so many people, and has, with so many different issues and changes that they wanted to make – not just smoking cessation. And although it could have been a story with a tragic ending, the death of one woman has meant the changes, healing, and hope of many others. And when our fair maiden comes to the end of her life, and she once again meets her mother, she will be able to tell her, with pride, and a gleam in her eye: “Mom, I kept my promise. Your wish has come true.” And her mom will take her into her strong, loving arms, and whisper in our fair maiden’s ear: “I already knew, honey, I already knew.”

The End – Or is it just the beginning?

Humoring the Hypnotist

In a recent post, somebody talked about being the subject during a learning session where the teacher tried to get her into somnambulism, pinched her to prove that she was there, and because Irene is a good sport, humored that teacher, not telling them that the pain was excruciating!!! Something similar happened to me (or did I happen to it?) at a convention (fortunately, minus the excruciating pain). And I'm not the only one! Always interested in free therapy, I very commonly will volunteer whenever hypnotists want to do a demonstration on me. I still have one thing left (therapy-wise that I've been working on for a long time, so any help is welcome)! The hypnotist (who shall remain nameless) told me he was going to do an Ericsonian induction, but what he really did was the NLP 5-minute phobia cure. I didn't feel any different after the work, but because he was in a large group, and because I didn't want to be difficult, I didn't tell him. "Oh yes, I feel much better,!" said I, in retrospect realizing that maybe no good was served by my lack of honesty. And then later on, I met one of the other volunteers for this hypnotist, and we compared notes. She said she didn't feel any different either, but lied so the hyp could save face. I'm not sure there's a moral here because I can't say what I would do under certain circumstances. I wouldn't want the hyp to be embarrassed. Perhaps I would tell the hyp later on what I really experienced (one-on-one) at the very least, so they would have knowledge.

I have no doubt this happens in our practices, too. But I think there are ways to avoid it, because being humored will not help anyone, most of all our clients! I know that even if we set these parameters, some people will still not tell us the truth, but we can create a safe-space for it to occur. I'll give you an example of how I do it. When I'm about to do my version of EFT on a client, I tell them that based on the information they have given me, I'm going to tap on them using different phrasing. I tell them that a lot of this phrasing will come from my intuition (besides the information that they have given me), and sometimes I might be WRONG. I tell them to please CHANGE the phrasing themselves to something that resonates. I tell them that I don't want them to humor me!

I think some variation of this can be done during intake, as well. And so along with all of Irene's superb suggestions for understanding the parameters of responsibility in the therapist-client relationship, some words about never, ever humoring us. That since our relationship depends on honesty (both ways), it's imperative that they tell us when something doesn't resonate or is not working for them. Will they do it? Maybe. Maybe not. But at least we've opened the door to the possibility of honesty. And that's a good thing.

Music to enhance learning / spirals

I sent this information to my client (who is about to take her finals), but I knew that it would be valuable for you, too! All of the following music has been proven to enhance learning. One can take the added step of tape recording one's studies into a tape recorder and then listening back, thus satisfying the auditory learners. I have added a couple of spirals, too. For this client, I hypnotized her deeply, then gave her a trigger whereby should would take three deep breaths, and repeat her key phrase during each breath, while watching the spiral. This would take her into hypnosis - the best place to learn anything! When she goes to take her finals, she can then once again hypnotize herself (and nobody will know), but it is best to take a test in the same state you were in when you studied (hypnotized!) And the best place to be in, too, for recall and focus.

Have fun!!

Here are some hypnoticspirals (If you want to look for more, just do a search on "free hypnosis spiral"):

• http://www.hypnotictapes.com
• http://www.diviniti.demon.co.uk

Here's the music to listen to.... (watch the spiral, three deep breaths along with your key words and you will be there).

Active Concerts:

• Beethoven - Concerto No. 5 in E-flat Major for Piano and Orchestra, op. 73 ("Emperor")
• Brahms - Concerto for Violin and Orchestra in D Major, op. 77
• Haydn - Concerto No. 1 in C Major for Violin and Orchestra and Concerto for Violin and String Orchestra, No. 1 in C Major and No. 2 in G Major,
• Symphony No. 67 in F Major and No. 69 in B Major
• Mozart - Concerto for Violin and Orchestra; Concerto No. 7 in D Major,
• Concerto for Piano and Orchestra, No. 18 in B flat Major
• Tchaikovsky - Concerto No. 1 in B-flat Minor for Piano and Orchestra

Passive Concerts:

• Bach - Choral Prelude in A Major and Prelude and Fugue in G
• Minor, Fantasy in G Major, Fantasy in C Minor, and Trio in D Minor,
• Cononic Variations and toccata, Symphony No. 2 for String Orchestra, Symphony in C Major, Symphony in D Major
• Corelli - Concerti Grossi, op.6, no. 2, 8, 5, 9, Concerti Grossi, op. 4, 10, 11, 12, Concerto for Organ and Orchestra
• Vivaldi - The Four Seasons, Five Concertos for Flute and Chamber Orchestra (water music, whatever that means ; -)

The Problem With Leading Your Clients!

Yesterday, I went for a hypnotherapy session with a hyp in my area who sought me out for a trade. If you have heard it said that all hypnotherapists are perfect, with no problems or challenges or issues of their own, don't believe them! So that was cool, I still have one thing I've been working on for a while.

I knew that she was planning on doing regression to cause with an affect bridge (it's what she does for every issue), and although that has been tried several times before on me with this particular issue, I had never had success. But I think I went in with the right mental attitude - that I was going to still my hypnotherapist's mind and let go! There is always the danger of going to another hypnotherapist and wanting to listen for techniques instead of surrendering, which is what is necessary for a good hypnotic trance.

This hyp was very effective with me (or was it me being effective with her?; - ) I felt like I let go really nicely (being fairly anal and controlling this was a lovely surprise to me). Then came the affect bridge... She really built that bad feeling up in me very effectively - the feeling of being out of control - and then I seem to have regressed to age four where my father was giving me a spanking for something I could not understand I was being spanked for. She asked me, "What was the feeling that I had about that spanking?" I told her that I felt like "It's not fair." Then she did it. She lost me (hypnotherapeutically speaking). She suggested to me (the caps are because she was yelling with great emotion) "YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE NOT GOING TO GET OUT ALIVE, DON'T YOU?!!" Um, no, not really. "YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE WORTHLESS AND HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU, DON'T YOU?" Uh, not really. In my now fully aware and awake hypnotherapist's mind, I'm thinking "uh oh, this is not good! What kind of crazy ideas are you implanting in my sensitive four-year old's mind? I told her, I don't believe in leading. She countered "who is in charge here, you or me?" I felt that I had let go very nicely, remember? Tears, blubbering, real panic, etc. She told me that I wasn't really in trance, and that I was holding back the whole time. Hmm, gee, I felt like I had the deepest trance I had had in a long time. Anyway, the real problem for me was the fact that she was leading.

You all know that I rant and rave about this from time to time. Do no harm. Do not lead your clients. This is how false memory syndrome happens. Ask them, "What emotion are you feeling right now?" "How does that make you feel?" You can then intensify that feeling, if you wish, by saying "Really allow yourself to feel those feelings." "What does that remind you of?" And so on. But please, never ever, ever assume you know what that person is feeling. You can create a sad/bad/non-serving feeling that never even existed. And that's a bad thing.

She then said "do you want to stop this right now?" I tried to talk to her about my feelings, but she insisted that she was in charge, that that was her training, and she would not budge. So what happened? She left me open. I had to give myself suggestions for closing myself and healing. And all last night and today, I've had this somewhat nauseas feeling, like bile rising in my throat. I think I need to do a little more healing on myself.

First hypnotherapist: Do no harm.

Hypnotherapist Coerced Sex

Based on the alleged rape case against a hypnotist in Florida, Wendi Freisen posted this poll on her group HypnoMasterMind@yahoogroups.com

Question: Under what cirumstances is it possible to coerce a client to have sex with a Hypnotherpist in a professional setting?

Responses

Choices	Votes	%
It is never possible.	1	2
Only possible if the client has a desire to engage in sex	15	30
The hypnotist has full control to override the clients value system and make her have sex	3	6
A hypnotist must have established a personal relationship that includes intimacy and creates a romantic interest from the client.	10	20
A client is always aware of the events during the session and has free will at all times to emerge from the trance at any time.	20	40

So far the results of Wendi's poll is very interesting! I want to encourage all of the people who believe that "A client is always aware of the events during the session and has free will at all times to emerge from the trance at any time" to read "Secret: Don't Tell: The Encyclopedia of Hypnotism." The oft quoted misconception that "we never do anything outside of our moral code or value system in hypnosis" just ain't so. Marylou's recent experience proves that.

In Europe in the early 1900's there were well documented cases of covert hypnosis resulting in great bodily harm and/or sex (with the hypnotist and the people he ordered his subject to engage with) plus great monetary harm. And we recently read about people being hypnotized out of their money - where was that - in Europe? Remember the story Alan Barsky told about his thoughtful, intelligent girlfriend who was hypnotized out of her dough? Hullo!

While the percentage of natural somnambulists is small (some say about 10-20%), the potential for influencing individuals hypnotically without their knowledge exists. It exists, people. I think it does require a natural somnambulist to submit to this kind of mind control. Unless! Unless we're talking about brain washing. Brain washing exists only under the most extreme cases (i.e. wartime, when people can be deprived of sleep, food, humanity, and can systematically be rendered incapable of resisting their captors wishes). This can happen to strong willed people. They can, of course, use drugs to help the process along. I believe our very own government has dabbled in mind control. A lot.

For the most part, while in a hypnotherapist's office, I think it would be rare that someone could let go to the extent that they would engage in sex they didn't want to. But I totally believe it can happen. And it is VERY easy to instill amnesia.

I think we should worry more about priests and their ability to do mind control over young boys than we do hypnotists, but that's just my take.

Is Hypnosis Addictive?

Yes! Lovers of hypnosis will often report that they are hypnojunkies! Why do folks become addicted to trance? It's physiological!

This is a direct quote from the book Secret: Don't Tell: The Encyclopedia of Hypnotism:

When you go into an altered state, you transfer into right brain, which results in the internal release of the body's own opiates, enkaphalins and Beta-endorphins, chemically almost identical to opium. (Transcript, Valley of the Sun Publishing Lecture Tape, Malibu, CA 1984, p. 6)

After trance, you also may feel:

...unlocalized feelings of exhilaration and well-being... There are, therefore, two main direct effects of hypnotic trances: first, the suggestibility during the trance phase itself; and second, the general, mildly euphoric sense of well-being immediately following the hypnotic trance. (Verdier, p. 69)

The rush of pleasurable cortical excitation, as you enter trance, tends to bring you back for more. So does the generalized feeling of relaxation and well-being that follows.

Marshall Sylver - Blech 2!!!

Oh my God. I just listened to Marshall Sylver on Howard Stern. Blech. Puke. Argh. I get a call from my husband on the way to his new job to tell me that Marshall will be on Howard. Out of morbid curiosity, I decide to listen. It was worse than I expected.

Howard Stern has a huge audience. Whatever good we've done dispelling the tragic myths and misconceptions of hypnosis has just been crippled by this show. What were the messages that people got from this show?:

• You will do or say anything in hypnosis
• You can be made to do things outside of your moral code or value system
• You are completely out of control in hypnosis

Marshall had one of Howard's new employees pretend that he was in Howard's apartment talking about things at the studio. Howard asked him that if he were in a boat with him and his wife who would he save. He said that he would save Howard over his wife. "There's only one you, but there's plenty of women out there." Howard asked him, if I asked you to "touch me" would you do it? The guy said yes, he'd do anything as a favor to Howard. Then, I don't know if this really happened, but it seemed to have judging from the reactions of the staff (a lot of screeching, laughing, and uncomfortable "oh my God's!," ) Howard asked him if he would put him in his mouth. And he supposedly did it. Howard also had this guy confess how he felt about every one of the staff, including Robin, who he basically said was useless.

Need I say more? Please don't make me say anymore. I had to turn it off because I was literally getting nauseous (tap. tap. tap.)

This kind of crap is no good for hypnosis. This is EXACTLY what I was talking about in my inflammatory post "Let's Be Careful."

(She said tongue firmly planted in cheek): But at least Marshall got to sell his new product "Subconscious Seduction," or some such B.S. (which isprobably the ABCs of NLP)

Another black day for hypnosis thanks to Marshall Sylver (and Howard Stern).

Steph

EFT - A Healer's Super Tool

I have helped people in planes, parking lots, restaurants, and cars. There is nowhere that I would feel uncomfortable helping people. The tools that I have at my disposal are so fabulous that I feel like everybody needs to know them and use them.

One of the most powerful tools that I have at my disposal is EFT.

The other day I went to a mini NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) seminar, and watched with great frustration while the seminar leader used NLP on this gal for love pain. I wanted to just jump in there and use EFT on her, because I knew that what took him one hour, would have taken me twenty minutes (max) using EFT. I'm not saying that there are not some really neat tools in NLP, but I've got to say that some things are simply more amenable to EFT.

If you're not familiar with EFT, it stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques. Created by a Stanford engineer named Gary Craig, it is like emotional acupuncture, without the needles. It is good for getting rid of negative emotions, non-serving beliefs, and many physical pains (that have an emotional component). The theory behind it is that all negative emotions are the result of an imbalance in the body's energy system. I have a tendency to believe that it is the other way around. I think that negative emotions create imbalances. Nevertheless, it doesn't really matter what the theories are, or why it works. Because by golly, it really works. It's amazing. It's one of those things that shocks you every time it does work because it is so easy. And yet it works so consistently well, you are surprised if you don't get a miracle every time! Gary Craig says "try it on everything." I agree. Utilizing the technique takes about two minutes. Instantly, you would feel a sense of calm and peace, no matter what the issue. But to get to the "bottom of the issue," you would have to get to the underlying reasons for the issue, and that's where the talents and skills of the therapist come in.

EFT is a very odd technique. It requires one to tap on various end-points of the meridian system ('a la acupuncture). Of course, nobody ever cut somebody open and found a "meridian system," but the theories seem to bear out under scientific scrutiny in double-bind tests that it does work. Then to get REALLY WEIRD, there is something called the nine-gamut procedure which requires you to roll your eyes around in your head, count, and hum. All in the name of healing! I won't explain the reasons behind these unusual gyrations, because I don't want this article to be too long, but you can do some of your own research on Gary Craig's massive website: www.emofree.com.

One of the great things about this tool is that it is easily and readily taught to someone. And although looking from the outside in, it looks so weird, if you can get over how you look doing it, you would have a super tool that would help you for the rest of your life. You could help others with it, too. In about two minutes you could take someone from serious overwhelm, or anxiety, or anger, or frustration, to calm. Of course, I utilize breath in conjunction with EFT, and that is wonderfully complimentary and helps the effectiveness of the technique, but it is not necessary.

I have been using EFT since 1997. I was one of Gary Craig's directors on his original email list when there were only about two hundred members. Since then, his list no longer has directors, but it does have contributing authors, and it's numbers are in the tens of thousands. Why? Because the stuff works.

Try it, you'll like it! And maybe I'll see you tapping on someone in a public place, or maybe I'll just see you tapping yourself! I envision a world where folks are tapping themselves on the freeway. Why? It's great for road rage! I envision a world where mothers are tapping their crying and whining children in public. Why? I don't like to hear crying and whining children in public! And why cry and whine when you can feel peaceful and comfortable? Not a bad idea, eh?

Hypnotizing Children in the Movies

My husband and I just went to see XXX: State of the Union. This is an exceedingly violent movie, with language and other ugly stuff. Why, in God's name would a parent bring a child to see this movie? I kid you not. There was a five-year-old sitting behind me! Now, I'm the worst. I believe that kid's undeveloped brains will take in this ugly stuff, make it okay, desensitize the child to real violence, and perhaps with enough input like this (especially the more violent video games), you end up with a Columbine, or the recent situation in Minnesota. What are parents thinking? Do they honestly think their children will not be affected by this stuff? Okay, maybe it will just be a few weeks of nightmares, or a general sense of uneasiness, and a feeling of a lack of safety. But maybe, just maybe, if the time is right, and the stars are in alignment, and there is enough of this type of input, and the child grows up feeling disenfranchised and unconnected anyway, they'll end up shooting a few police officers, teachers, and students. They allowing their children to be hypnotized into believing that all that violence is okay. Don't they get it?

What THE HELL are parents thinking? Sometimes I feel like turning around and asking them just that: "What THE HELL are you thinking?!!! Are you aware that your child is being hypnotized by all of this violence?!!!" But of course, that would not go over very well. So I bite my tongue, and pray that the parent will realize, just maybe, when the kid crawls into their bed tonight crying, and they ask their child what's the matter, they'll remember that their child saw forty-three people getting blown up, bridges collapsing, and the President of the United States about to get assassinated. Maybe something will click.

Now, the next thing I have to ask myself is: "what the hell was *I* thinking going to see that movie? Well, that one was pretty bad (although my hubby did like it), but I do recommend Sahara. But damn it, take some advice from a hypnotist: don't take your kids!!!

Is stress good for you?

What an odd notion to think that stress might be good for you. But just think about it. If you were too relaxed, peaceful, and serene you'd never get anything done! "Oh, I'll just get to that tomorrow. So what if I promised my customer it would be done in three days. They'll understand." No way! So a little bit of stress, and a lot of good focus and concentration is what you need to succeed. It is when the stress begins to paralyze you, or cause you to feel too overwhelmed, that you need to take notice, and you need to do something about it.

It’s not news that stress causes disease, and that stress can kill, so what can you do about it besides sit on a psychoanalyst’s couch for an hour every week? Well, the first tip I want to give you is this: Breathe! When we are stressed, or anxious, one of the things we naturally do is hold our breath, or breathe shallowly. This is precisely the opposite of what we need to do to combat stress. Try this now: from the belly, and all the way up into the throat, take a long deep, slow breath, inhaling through the nose. When you get to the top of the breath, sloooowly release the breath out of your mouth until there is absolutely no breath left. You might have to "catch your breath" at the end, because you would have completely emptied your body of the breath. Do three of these in a row, making sure to drop your shoulders with each exhalation. Do these wonderful breaths, as needed. Now get back to work!

What Are Sessions Like?

If you already know about my philosophy on healing, you know that I believe that healing does not have to be painful. Yes, sometimes we will visit "charged" memories, but my ultimate agenda is to have you walk out feeling peaceful and somehow freer than when you walked in.

Your agenda is my agenda. I will do my utmost to give you exactly what you want. Sometimes I may suggest what I think an underlying issue might be, but if you tell me, no, Stephanie, I don't want to work on that, we won't work on it. Until you are ready.

Sessions with me are casual and comfortable. My treatment room with attached bathroom are decorated in soft-soothing colors of pink, blue, lavender, and purple. If you enjoy them, I will light candles (I have many) and fountains, of which I have three. We are planning a waterfall in the back eventually, perhaps in about a month (of this writing April, 21, 2005).

My dog likes to visit during sessions. She will typically lie down behind my chair and not make a peep. She is a big dog - a 75 pound lab mix, but she's very intuitive as to what is going on the session, I believe she is a great healer, herself. Even though she is pretty shy, she loves it when people have just been hypnotized and she will come up to you after I bring you out of trance to kiss you on the hand. If you are uncomfortable with dogs, just tell me. We can do one of two things about that: 1) I will help you get over your discomfort, or 2) I will put her in another room.

Having filled out your intake form, I will read it and ask you any questions that I might have about it. You will get to know me, and I will get to know you. I will ask you questions, and do a thorough intake. Typically in a first session, I will want to teach you EFT (www.emofree.com). This technique is like emotional acupuncture, without the needles. It is a way for you to learn how to help yourself! It is good for all negative emotions, non-serving beliefs, and many physical pains that have an emotional component. I will hypnotize you so that you begin to learn what the hypnotic process is all about. Typically we won't do any deep work, because you need to get used to being hypnotized, this is why I will give you a cd or tape to listen to in the coming week. This cd or tape is me doing hypnotic relaxation. It is designed to help you get used to relaxing to the sound of my voice. Sometimes, if you are a great trance subject, we might do deep healing work, but only if you are a natural somnambulist. About 20% of the population falls into this category. The other exception is if you have done a lot of hypnosis (then you are used to the process). But again, I am very flexible, and I want you to have your agenda fulfilled, so I will endeavor to help you fulfill it! Typically, I will see you once a week, until you feel you are done with your issues or inspiration. It is very common, however, for folks to want to come back and see me perhaps once a month or once every two months for refreshers. Hypnosis feels great, and it is nice to be listened to. Folks love coming to see me! And I love seeing my clients!

Each session that you come and see me, you will tell me what you wish to work on that day, we will go over the preceding time period to see how you are doing, and to see if you need a refresher in any area. What is interesting is that as you go along, you might discover things you would like to work on. Typically, I will see folks anywhere from three to twelve sessions depending on the issues you are trying to resolve, your willingness to be a part of the healing process, and how good of a trance subject you are. There are a LOT of variables. At some point, if you would like me to, I would like to teach you how to hypnotize yourself, too! This is another way that you can learn to help yourself.

I am more than happy to talk to you with absolutely no strings attached. I am here to serve you... you are the boss.

Do As I Say, Not As I Do

So I am in a line at the supermarket (again) and I'm in the 15-item-or-less-line (which should move rather quickly, right? Wrong!) Being the friendly, outgoing sort I am, I turn around and say something to this older lady who is clearly the grandmother of this (oh, I'd say) eight-year-old-child, to the effect of "this is supposed tobe the fast lane." Something pretty inane like that, but sure to create rapport since we're both wondering why things are moving soooo slooooowly. So she says to me: "no shit!" I say to the little girl (as inane as I possibly can be, and knowing I'm about to get myself into trouble): "you didn't hear that (wink wink)." And so the grandmother says to me, "oh she doesn't repeat it." And I say (uh oh, let's take it up a notch): "She will." Talk about breaking rapport! The grandmother says "she hears it on television, too, and she never says it, we tell her not to." Time to get the heck out of there! But of course, I can't. I'm stuck in the line. My cheeks are burning, small rivulets of perspiration running down my armpits. Okay, that's an exaggeration, but I can tell my deodorant is working for me. I know, without a shadow of a doubt that one day, this child is going to blurt out "NO SHIT" and be in deep Kim Chee. The very same thing happened to me.

I was probably the same age as that child, playing outside in our backyard, hanging upside down on a Jungle Jim we had in our backyard. I know my father was there. I don't remember anybody else being there. What I DO remember is blurting out the phrase (which, by the way, I had no idea what it meant) GODDAMN IT! Boy, did I get a spanking for that! I had NO IDEA why my father was so upset with me. Talk about pattern-interrupt, negative anchoring, and post-hypnotic suggestion!! It doesn't matter if you tell your children not to do a thing, when you are doing it yourself. The message is that if YOU are doing it (oh, all-powerful, all-knowing adult), your child will think it's okay. The message is much, much louder than your words. It's like smoking cigarettes. Don't you DARE do as I do, do as I say! Naw. 'Fraid that's not how it works. The post-hypnotic suggestion is much stronger in the doing than in the saying.

I wonder when this little girl is going to blurt out "No Shit." The grandma is going to be so surprised. But maybe she will remember the lady in the market who warned her that her grandchild would say it. Maybe the child won't get a spanking, then. But she probably will ; - (

Finding YOUR Voice

Somebody reported that they are taking a hypnotherapy training program, their practice partners tell her they love her voice, she loves her voice, she is often told she loves her voice, but the instructor wants her to change.

This situation is truly a metaphor for life, isn't it? You KNOW something is good, something is right, something is actually perfectly wonderful. You like your own voice, for goodness sake! Most people can not say that at all. If you took a survey of ten people, most likely nine of them would tell you they don't like their voice, or that they are uncomfortable hearing it. But YOU like yours!!! Other people like yours. But you question yourself because one "authority source" tells you that you are doing it wrong.

Please ask the instructor to pass your test, then go on to rediscover your own beautiful voice. Besides, if you speak softly, people will listen more closely to be able TO HEAR you!

Sometimes, however, it doesn't make sense to speak softly or slowly - for example when you are trying to motivate someone, or to excite them, or create feelings of pleasure and happiness - then you should take it up a notch. Your voice should always be congruent with the message you are delivering.

But the point I really wanted to make is this: trust yourself, trust your truths, believe in yourself and your voice. Find your own voice. That's the REAL lesson here. Hear?!

Vacations with Hypnosis

I want to talk about the idea of hypnosis just for fun, pleasure, and relaxation. I want to talk about the idea of giving our clients a hypnotic vacation. We have all heard it. Stress kills. I have read somewhere that 70% of all diseases are stress related or exacerbated. Most people have an agenda when they call us to book an appointment, but not all. Some people just want to be hypnotized. Some people want a vacation from their everyday lives. What could be less expensive than a trip to your friendly, neighborhood hypnotherapist for an hour of unwinding? With suggestions like, "You will feel as though you had a week-long vacation after this session," and "all of your cares, worries, and concerns will simply fall away, and you will feel renewed." we CAN give folks a vacation! A REAL vacation.

Just think! Your clients would not have to pack any bags (or forget their sunscreen), bring the kids (and forget their sunscreen, too), no hectic trips to the airport or to the dock, no frantic calls to baby sitters or loving friends (who might not feel so loving after baby sitting your children), no using up valuable accrued vacation time, no spending exorbitant amounts of money on silly touristy nick-knacks. No difficulties with speaking the language of the region. No problems with squeaky beds, or noisy neighbors in the next room frolicking like bunnies (you know what I mean - sly wink). No shots. No dysentery. No passports. No cranky kids with sticky hands asking repeatedly "are we there yet!?" None of that! Just one hour of pure pleasure - and none of the pain. And with the suggestion that the hour will seem like a week (time expansion), their vacation is complete. Of course, they won't have the nice tan, but they won't get skin cancer, either!

As therapists, it could seem weird to not have a therapeutic agenda like weight loss or smoking cessation. But (I feel this with all my heart), hypnosis in and of itself, can be the means to the end. We are stunningly blessed to be able to give people the gift of a vacation! Think about it, if you gave all of your clients a session with simple, uncomplicated, non-abreactive, comfortable, lovely hypnosis so they would feel as though they had been on a vacation, what an amazing, amazing treat.

And ultimately, who knows, you *could* be saving their lives by diverting the possibility of a stress-induced illness.

Come outside of your box and play! You'll help your clients save a lot of money on cruises.